I mean, what's salt, first question to ask...well NaCl, a mineral rock and all that stuff I studied years ago at college, History of salt, more of the same, well, to be sincere, I didn't studied it at college but I read it plenty of times in my bedside table book of all times, The Clan of the Cave Bear and all the saga (the fourth book is a total crap, I was so disappointed when I read it, Ayla was my heroine, the girl I wanted to be when I grew up, and suddenly it was just another disgustingly perfect Mary Sue, I hated it!). So, I'm reading the info at wiki, and I don't want to make a copy-paste kind of work, but I'm so not in the mood to make an effort about it that I'm really tempted.
I think it would be the best idea if I let it be, and tomorrow start over with it.
See you tomorrow (maybe I'll talk about chocolate, I have to write an essay about it too ^^)
They said that I need to test my level before start any class, so they gave me a date for next friday. I'm quite nervous, because I've always been crap at grammar, and I'm afraid it would be all the test is about.
So maybe it would be the best for me to try to write at least a few lines everyday in english to improve my fluency. Maybe Jane Austen will help!!!
Fingers crossed! (I think that if I keep the fingers crossed til next friday, they'll become a bit painfully cranky, right?)
- Music:Puirt a Beul-Capercaillie
Ahora pienso que quizá tuviera razón. Aquellos que son cercanos a mi saben que es verdad, que llevo dándole vueltas al mismo tema años y bueno, el hecho de que sólo falten 3 meses para que acabe el 2009 no está mejorando las cosas. Tengo una espada de Damocles encima y la veo pender sobre mi cabeza con ominosa cercanía. Cada día que pasa y tacho del calendario hace que el peso sobre mis hombros aumente. No sé si voy a ser capaz de hacerlo, de enfrentarme a una realidad que quizá no quiero saber, de vivir con el conocimiento de que las cosas nunca serán como las soñé.
Vivir con los ojos cerrados es tan fácil, es tan sencillo dejarse llevar por los sueños, por la fantasía de que lo que anhelas pueda ser verdad...Me debo a mi misma hacer frente a las cosas, ahora estoy en un punto sin retorno, y la verdad es que no puedo seguir así. Tengo que seguir adelante con mi vida y no vivirla en aras de la esperanza de que las cosas sean como yo quiero.
Lo que me lleva a pensar en la injusticia que me parece que no sean así. ¿Por qué nunca salgo ganando? Estoy tan cansada de estar siempre en el mismo maldito punto, tan harta de recoger mis pedazos una y otra vez del suelo e intentar reconstruírme, siendo cada vez más difícil hacerlo. No sé si esta vez seré capaz de superarlo o me convertiré en piedra definitivamente.
Lo peor es que ya no sólo pienso en ello cuando no estoy haciendo nada, o cuando apago la luz por las noches y me quedo a solas conmigo misma, no. No puedo pensar en otra cosa, las 24 horas del día. Sinceramente, estoy agotada mentalmente, y aterrada.
Me da tanto miedo, tanto...
- Mood:
sad - Music:capercaillie-ailein duinn
It's been a long time since my last update!
Well, my life went crazy for bit, and I wasn't on the mood to write about it or to talk about it, if I told the truth. Afert being in London for a month and half, where I was working at a catering company called Just Hospitality, I begun to wonder about the type of life I was living, and the things I really liked ant the things I really wanted to do.
Most of you know that I was having a hard time with my career...You know that I love Biology, I really love it, I think that is the most beautiful career in the world, but...I simply cannot do it, I don't know why I couldn't pass the subjects, I wasn't...motivated to spend more hours studying...It was that sensation of failure, claustrophoby and wrongness for six years, and it was killing me. I felt like a stupid girl, when I knew that I'm not stupid, I 'm perfectlly capable and I'm a hard worker girl. Why I was trying so hard without achieve anything? It was like chocking.
I couldn't seen myself in ten years working as a biologist, I started dreaming about cooking, and have my own restaurant, and that beautiful coffee-bookshop, and an amazing Bed&Breakfast at England...If I wanted to study for being a cook, why not do it NOW and stopping to have pesimistic thoughts about my miserable professional life? You know, I'm an action-girl, If I want it, I work to have it. I had to stop moping and begin acting.
I had a very hard time wondering what to do and finnally, after almost a year of thinking, crying and feeling like crap, I decided to quit Biology (which I was starting to hate, and I think that was so sad it had to stop), for the moment, and start a new career in the cook profession.
The beggings were hard, very hard. My parents didn't took very well my decision, but they are wonderful persons, and not only they love me, they know me better than anyone, and they know about my passion for cooking, and you know, I'm not bad about it!!! Ask my friends!
Right now I'm feeling really satisfied with myself for a very long time. I'm happy!!!! The last time I was that happy was at London, when Dean Kennett give the job at JH (and I think it was more relief than happiness^^). I've achieved very good grades at all my subjects, I've made some very good friends (well, friends friends, just one, but quite nice people), I know that I'm not stupid, I feel intelligent again and well...I'm ecstatic as you can see!!!!
Wish me good luck in this chapter of my life!!! I'll invite you for dinner at some point!!!!
Thanks all of you who has been there for me at every step of this decission, because, even if I didn't told you anything, your love, support and believing in me and my skills is very important. I love you all so much I can't express it just in words, hugs and "coulants au chocolat". It's more than that, more than anything. Thank you so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lots of love, pink hearts, chubby angels and sugar floating all around us!!!! Dance in circle, giving our hands and sing out loud cheerful songs, fluffy people!!!! Life is Beautiful!!!
- Location:home
- Mood:
cheerful - Music:Heeeere we areeeee, born to be kings, we're the princes of the universe!!!
- Location:Mi caaaasaaaaaa
- Mood: cheerful
- Music:Noa
It's been such a long time since my last post!!!!!
Wooaaah....I'm a lazy girl concernig to update my livejournal...not that anyone really cares, so...what for I'm going to do the effort to write something here?? If its really important, I'll ring my friends and tell the news.
Buuut, today is my birthday, and as every year I'm quite receptive to horoscopes, divination technics, etc... And the curiosity killed the cat. I went to my horoscope profile at www.astro.com and checked on my horoscope for today and my being in love and relationships (I'm alone as the moon, so I'm always lurking for information about it) and this is my profile as lover.
- Mood: mischievous
It was a long time since the last time I went with both of my parents to the cinema, and yesterday, (after a few days with my mother at home, because the 22 of Janaury is holiday at Valencia, and I was soooo frustrated and bored) we decide to go to the cinema to watch the new film of Alex De la Iglesia, The Oxford Crimes (with Elijah Wood, John Hurt and Leonor Waitling among others), but my father convinced us to watch instead "Across the Universe".
He told us that the film was about the Vietnam War and some peace movements in England and USA, with The Beatles songs as a soundtrack. I was so sceptic, because that kind of movies are so depressing, cruel and violent that are quite disturbing for me....but, I accepted to see that movie instead of the other (It's just released and I can wait, and probably this one is near to get out of the cinemas).
He lied to me!!!!! It was a fucking amazing musical!!!!!!!! With a loads of beautiful songs, and a sad but beautiful story!!! I think is the movie of the year for me, it came directly trough my heart, and probably will never leave it. I fell in love with that film, and I recommend you to go to the nearest cinema and watch it, because you need to watch the movie, and cry, and laugh and feel that you're part of something, and be totally high when the movie finishand everybody starts to clap entusiatically (me lo he inventado?), and the credits are going on with "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" playing, and all the people at the cinema singing!!!!!
So, go to the cinema and watch that movie, because if you love The Beatles, and you like musicals, you're going to enjoy the time of your life, I swear to you that.
Kisses!!!!!!
- Mood: grateful
( JCS Odissey )
Hello!!
I want to post today not because I have something interesting to say or saw something at the newspaper I wanted to comment. Its because I saw my last entry and is very sad.
Things are not really different now, but I feel a lot better about it. Well, I'm not enjoying Cayden right now, because he is a very very naughty cat and yesterday attacked me (I've got a hole in my upper-arm...TT), but things with my parents are fine now, and I'm not that bored.
I'm going to class, so, bye, and thanks for listening to me when I need it.
- Location:PC's room
- Music:la gente grita muy alto, en este país no hay educación
I'm back at Spain, and I wish I could said that I'm happy here, and enjoying my cat, but is not true (the part that I'm happy, I'm enjoying Cayden so much!!) because I can't stand my parents, they are nice, very nice, but I think they don't really understand that I'm 23 years old, and they don't need to take care of me, or know everywhere I go, or whit who...I don't know, I'm not comfortable at my own house, I'm nervous and sad all the time, and I'm missing so much the people I left at UK...I don't know how I'm going to live like that, I don't want to argue every day whit them, but I think that is not going to be possible...the things are quite tense and a bit angry for me...
Well, I'm going to have some dinner, watch TV, knitt a slytherin scarf and read a bit at bed.
Good night and enjoy your lives if you can!! Do it for me, please!!!!
Kisses for everybody
Finnally, after all this time handing out CV's, I've got a job. Is in a catering comapny, near the blue phalic thing. I'll start tomorrow, and I'm very excited!!! I've got a job, I've got a jooob, my mind sings when everything is calm. Now I'm going to start writing the flashfic for this month, I love the pairing, and I hope I could do something interesting and beauty in a tearfull way.
See you soon!!!
PS: I've got a job, I've got a joob...
- Location:Home
- Mood: I've got a jooob
- Music:The cars in the street, and Ed & Borja chating in French
It's raining....pity, the bad weather infludes in my mood...I've got already my oyster card, and my travel card, and now I'm calm, because my helga's costume for the release of the 7º book of Harry Potter arrived yesterday at Duare's home. I'm having a very good time, and I've thought that I will miss my parents and cayden a lot more. Probably I'm not doing it because I've got so many friends here and I spend a very few moments alone.
It's a very good thing thaat I'm in a house where I've to speak english and heard a lot of english, because, slowly, I'm changing my language chip, and probably be more easy to me to start speaking in english with strange people. But I'm still embarrased, because I think I'm doing it so bad, and people thinks I'm hopeless.
Well, I'm going to sleep and tomorrow go to the bank and open an account, have a new mobile phone number(for english calls) and I expect go to see my catalan friends, because i have some much fun with them. And I'm here to spend time with them, not only to improve my english and look for a job.
Bye!!!!
- Location:Ed's home
- Mood: exhausted
Ok! I can breath again, I've got my pounds reserved for Wednesday, I said goodbye to all my closest friends, I've got my bagagge prepared, and my CV in english printing.
- Location:PC room
- Mood: chipper
- Music:la lavadoraaa
Surprisingly I passed all my exams and I'm going to London for work all the summer. An entire summer without my parents, without my people, far from home an far from my spanish problems (like that guy I like but he don't likes me, for example) Sounds great, don't you think so?
The fucking reality is that I'm scared, and nervous, and expecting, and an incredible amount of feelings that I'm not able to tell you because my english is not that thick. A lot of questions invades my mind: I'll find a job? I'll be comfortable with my house renters? (I supose that, because Borja is a good friend) I'll miss my parents? Probably not them (We don't spend the summer together since three or two years ago, so...) but my home, my bed, my PC, my beautiful car and my little killer cat.
I'm going to miss Cayden (the killer cat, for the new people) a lot. He is my baby, is the first time I'm going to be without him for more than a week since he started living with me. I know my hands and ankles would be grateful to be far from his paws and teeth...but my soul and my heart are going to miss him terribly. He's going to spend the summer in a "camp", because I've got an alergical cousin who spends a pair of weeks with my parents in or appartment in the beach, and obviously, we don't want the kid dead by an anaphilactic shock....poor Pablo (my cousin)
And my Changos....my friends. I'm not going to miss everyone of them, but I'm going to miss some of them a lot: Pablo, Marcelo, Tonet, Begoña, Hector, Javi, Irene, Sonia, Diana, Maria, Blanca...This is my first summer without any of them since I was six years old, they are my old friends, people who knows me more than anyone, people who saw me in my worst moments, and in my better.
But in London are Duare, Mekare_Caillea, Aviss, Morgana...., and a new country, a new city and a new language. I'm going to learn a lot of things, see the end of the Harry Potter serie and cry all the water can be cried when someone I'm thinking about dies.
Well, I'm going to work a little ando go to sleep, because is late, and tomorrow will be a very long day (Since past Wednesday, the days seems to have 48 hours....it's very fatigating)
Por si no os habéis dado cuenta, algunos verbos me los invento directamente, y todo en si da bastante angustieja, pero oye, una hace lo que puede y para ser la primera vez que escribo algo del tirón y totalmente improvisado no está mal!
- Location:PC room
- Mood:
anxious - Music:cayden mews
Estoy aquí más aburrida que un higo chumbo, delante de un ordenador y sin que se me ocurra nada que hacer!!! Unbelivable!!! Ahora no tengo clase, he salido de ella hace media horita y podría irme a casa, pero está la Sra. Maruja, que es la señora que limpia en mi casa desde que el mundo es mundo para mi, y no me apetece nada aguantar la charla de una señora con un montón de problemas.
En fin...que he cotilleado livejournals de personas conocidas y desconocidas, he escrito de Stand By Me (tres párrafos...wowowowowowo) sigo sin avanzar nada, pero es que no sé que me pasa con esa historia que siempre estoy en el mismo punto...cansina que es una a veces. También he pasado algunas direcciones de lo de las naranjas y he probado todas las posibles combinaciones de vuelos y chorradas varias de ese estilo. Pues eso, que nos vamos a ir por nada a Londres. Está por ver si encontramos trabajo y tal.
Duare!!! Que igual si que podmeos contar con Godric, que me ha dicho hace un rato que sale a las 3 de currar y que tiene los findes libres!! Habrá que pensar en el disfraz.
Pues nada, me he encontrado ahora mismo con Lilith Riddle y entre mis opciones de quedarme aquí vegetando o salir fuera y fotosintetizar un ratito, la balanza se ha inclinado claramente a favor de la fotosíntesis.
Besos de colores para todos y ¡¡Nos vemos en los bares!!
Hey!! Darkmoona se ha pasado todo el día pasándome links a sitios interesantes. Como mi horóscopo no os lo voy a poner, porque es algo muy privado, aunque ahora luego os dejaré un link a la paginita en cuestión (es jodidamente alucinante), os dejo esto, que ha llamado profundamente mi atención, por curioso, clavado y por original:
Visual DNA
- Mood: amused
Pero bueno, todo lo malo se termina, y lo bueno llega después. He aprendido que también puedo escribir Het, que el NC-17 me cuesta más de lo que me pensaba, pero me es más facil, muchísimo más hacerlo en slash (quizá porque no me siento tan implicada ni me parece tan personal). Aunque considero que me ha salido somero y horrible, no me gusta nadaaa. Y eso que el pairing no me desagradaba, porque Rod/Bella, es algo que tengo más que asumido, y de hecho, la pareja me atrae, pero...para leerlo, no para escribirlo. Lo cual indica que menos mal que Darkmoona y yo reestructuramos Doble Juego (ya verési, ya...) y que Rod y Bella saldrán pero no una barbaridad, que si no, ella no lo sé, pero yo las iba a pasar putas escribiendo...
Pues eso, que se acabó lo que se daba, y mañana a alternar el hincar el codo con escribir el siguiente capítulo de La Cuenta, que al ritmo que voy, igual es beteado en UK, no? Estaría chulo, aunque espero que no...porque tampoco quiero tardar hasta marzo en tenerlo listo (Que a principios de febrero esté, por fa, musas y musos sopladme al oído, a ver si me inspiro!!!)
Venga va, lo dejo ya y me voy a dormir, que mañana volvemos al cole (mejor dicho a la fac) y hay que descansar!
Naniiiit!!!!
| Orpheus 33% Extroversion, 80% Intuition, 72% Emotiveness, 52% Perceptiveness |
| You are an artist, an aesthete, a sensitive, and someone who has never really let go of that childlike innocence. To you, all of life has a sense of wonder in it, and the story of Orpheus was written about someone just like you. When the Argo passed the island of the Sirens, Orpheus played a song more beautiful than the Sirens to prevent the crew from becoming enticed. When his wife died, he ventured into the underworld to charm Hades but, in his naivete, he looked back becoming trapped there. You can capture your unique world view and relate it to others with the skill of a master storyteller. Your sensitivity and creativity make you a treasure to the human race, but your thin-skinned nature and innocence can cause you a lot of disenchantment and pain. What's doubly unfortunate is that, if you try to lose those traits, you never will, and everyone will be able to tell that you're putting up an artificial shell to prevent yourself from being hurt. Famous people like you: Hemingway, Shakespeare, Mr. Rogers, Melville, Nick Tosches Stay clear of: Icarus, Hermes, Atlas |
 |
My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
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| Link: The Greek Mythology Personality Test written by Aleph_Nine on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test |
Yo que me marchaba hoy de viaje a la Tierra Media...snif snif!! Y ahora en lugar de estar en un bus camino a Barcelona a reunirme con el resto de la Comunidad del Anillo, estoy aquí en casa bajándome cosas de internet y en pijama...que decadente, por todos los Dioses del Averno (no toy de humor para encomendarme a otros dioses más cheerfulls)
Arrrggg!!!!!!!!! Las viscisitudes de ser madre soltera y con padres gilipollas, porque yo los quiero, jolin, pero es que es lo que son...qué más les daba pasar de mi primo alérgico una semana y quedarse con su peludo nieto?? Ehh?? Y yo me hubiese ido por ahí a frikear tranquilamente, a disfrutar del descanso que me he ganao a pulso!!! Todo el puto mes de Julio trabajando como una mula para nada!! La rabia que me da...no está escrita!!!
Pero bueno, no está en mi naturaleza lamentarme sin descanso, flagelarme una y otra vez con las desgracias que acometen contra mis esperanzas e ilusiones, llorar sin descanso y arrancarme la piel a tiras...nahhh, yo soy más de decir: No me dejas ir?? Pues te vas a cagar, chaval!!! Ahora em vas a pagar un viaje a Paris en octubre que te voy a dejar tieso, y además, en tu vida te vas a sentir más culpable, pensando que estoy deprimida por tu culpa (que mis padres jamás entren en mi livejournal, plis pliiiis!!!). Pues eso.
No bstante, no es como si se acabase el mundo, simplemente me da una rabia que te cagas y necesitaba desahogarme. Tampoco es como si no fuera a ver a mis amigos nunca más, pero los estoy echando de menos desde la última vez que nos vimos y me moría por estar con ellos otra vez.
Bueno, en poco más de una semana me iré a verlos y ya ta. Se me quitará la morriña.
ya está todo, simplemente necesitaba un desfogue. Besitos a todos y gracias por aguantar la chapa.
- Location:My place
- Mood:
pissed off - Music:Personal Jesus- Marylin Manson
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